Many of us were raised with a powerful promise: if you work hard, you will succeed. Our culture reinforces it with stories of determination. But what happens when the equation does not add up? You prepare carefully, give something of your time and heart, and still do not get the job, pass the exam, save the relationship, or reach the goal. Failure can hurt because it is rarely only about the outcome. A setback may stir up fears about worth, belonging, or the future. You might think, “What is wrong with me?” or “Why wasn’t my effort enough?” Your body may react...