How do you feel about change?

How do you feel about change?

Change is the foundation of the classic New Year’s “reset.” When we set resolutions, we attempt to fuel motivation with the hope of achieving meaningful growth. For some, this feels exciting—a fresh start. For others, it can feel overwhelming, like facing an uphill climb toward a long-desired goal without the time, energy, or momentum to get there.

Despite wanting the outcome, the journey to achieve a goal can feel daunting. Why can’t we just snap our fingers and arrive?

Why Change Can Be Challenging

Change often represents the unknown, which can feel scary. Humans thrive on stability—routine, predictability, and clear expectations create a sense of safety. Yet, as Esther Perel notes, this same stability can stifle creativity or fizzle long-term relationships.

So, what’s the right balance? A healthy mix of stability and risk. In areas like finances or career, stability can feel freeing because it reduces mental load. At the same time, taking risks—like setting a new goal—can inspire growth and passion.

This ebb and flow mirrors The Hero’s Journey, a storytelling structure that balances stability with the excitement of venturing into the unknown. This cycle can apply to any one of our personal journeys, even on an ordinary day.

The Difference Between Goals and Intentions

• Goal Setting: Focused on achieving a specific outcome. Goals are measurable and often future-oriented, but they can lead to burnout if not balanced with realistic expectations.
• Intention Setting: A commitment to a way of being or a present-focused journey. Intentions aren’t attached to specific outcomes but instead emphasize mindfulness and flexibility.

Our culture often prioritizes goal setting—doing more, achieving more, being more. This “doer” mindset can strain the nervous system, leading to burnout and self-criticism when goals aren’t met.

Intentions, on the other hand, focus on the process rather than the result. They encourage presence and alignment with what matters most.

How to Begin Your Intention-Setting Practice

Here are some steps to get started with intention setting:

• Center Yourself

• Sit comfortably and notice your body’s connection to the ground or chair.
• Focus on your breath and allow thoughts to come and go without judgment.
• Bring yourself fully into the present moment.

• Reflect on Key Questions

• What would you like to build, create, or nurture in your life?
• What matters most to you?
• What would you like to let go of?
• How do you feel when you’re your happiest self?
• What makes you proud?

• Choose an Intention

• Identify a word, phrase, or image that represents your focus.
• Examples: “Find Balance,” “Act with Courage,” “Breathe,” or “Ease.”

• Make It Tangible

• Write it down or place it somewhere visible, like a sticky note on your fridge.
• Change a password to your intention so you engage with it daily.

• Incorporate It Daily

• Silently state or visualize your intention during your morning routine, meditation, or movement practice.
• Revisit it when you need a guide or feel frazzled.

Reflection Questions to Guide Your Intentions

Use these prompts to explore what resonates with you:

• What fears would you like to release?
• Who would you like to forgive?
• What are you grateful for?
• What word(s) would you like to align yourself with?
• What would you like to nurture in your life?

Choose one area that feels most aligned with where you are right now.

The Balance Between Goals and Intentions

There’s space for both goals and intentions in personal growth. Goals push us to achieve, while intentions ground us in the present. Together, they create a balanced approach to change.

In this New Year of 2024, I challenge you to try intention setting. Notice how it feels in your body:

• Does it bring lightness, tension, or openness?
• How does it affect your motivation and passion?

If goal setting resonates more with you, that’s okay too! Reflect on how pursuing your goals feels day-to-day in your nervous system.

Intentions offer a powerful way to stay grounded and connected to what matters most, without the pressure of achieving specific outcomes. Whether you choose to set goals, intentions, or both, remember to reflect on what feels right for you in this season of change.